Boldly Going Pt 5 (Star Trek V: The Final Frontier, 1989)

ST_the_Final_Frontier_PosterAfter the success Leonard Nimoy had with the Voyage Home, William Shatner had the desire to try his hand at directing a feature film (he had directed some episodes of the show T.J. Hooker a few years prior).

Opening with a stranger approaching a drifter on the plains of a remote planet Nimbus III, the stranger talks to the drifter of pain and releasing the pain. We then visit Kirk, Spock and McCoy on a camping trip where they enjoy roasting marshmallows and trying to get Spock to enjoy singing “Row Your Boat”.

The three are called to a newly built (and glitchy Enterprise) to face a new crisis occurring at Nimbus III. There they  run into the mysterious Stranger, revealed to be the Vulcan Sybock. Sybock has cast away the Vulcan adherence to logic and embraced his emotions. He also seems to be able to convert people to his message quickly. They arrest Sybok, not realizing that this is what he wants. Once on board, he manages a mutiny by converting the crew, leaving Kirk, Spock and Bones on the run within the enterprise.

The Final Frontier is often ridiculed as terrible.  Instead of a threat like a mysterious probe or a revenge seeker from the past, the movie pontificates on the nature of pain and whether God needs a starship.

But you know…this time around? I had some fun.  This is a flawed film, but honestly, Sybok is an interesting character. And there is some fun moments throughout.  There is a solid moment where Sybok is facing “God”…and he realizes the being simply took advantage of Sybok’s ego to find importance that is a real terrific performance moment by Laurence Luckenbill.

The film makes it it pretty clear that this is a trapped alien intelligence, not “God” and the resolution feels pretty uninspired. Really, this plot almost feels like it would have been more at home as an episode of the Original Series. And considering that by this time, the Q Continuum had been introduced, the idea almost feels repetitive.  And since the Next Generation explored Q better, there is nothing that feels…meaty here.  But I have to say, I don’t think the Final Frontier is so much outright bad as it just lacks any real impact for the characters, the franchise or the audience.

What Are Little Boys Made Of? (the Omen, 1976)

the_Omen_1976_PosterThe book of 1st John 4:3 states “but every spirit that does not acknowledge Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you have heard is coming and even now is already in the world.”  A couple centuries back, the concept of pre-tribulation raptures and a singular big “A” Antichrist took hold. There was an obsession with this brand of dispensationalism in the 70’s.  There was the book the Late Great Planet Earth (which spun off a “documentary”) and a series of low budget Christian films starting with a Thief in the Night.

But Hollywood wanted in on this too. The end result is the Omen, directed by Richard Donner and starring Gregory Peck, Lee Remick, David Warner and one of the Doctors.

Robert and Katherine Thorne are grieving over their stillborn child when a priest offers the opportunity to bring home an infant whose mother died giving birth.  And so they raise the young boy named Damien as their own.  As time passes, strange events seem to surround the boy. He also behaves strangely, for instance freaking out as if in great pain as they approach a church. On his fifth birthday, everyone is shocked as his nanny publicly hangs herself.

The new nanny, who brings a large and imposing dog with her, is seemingly a bit odd. Robert is approached by individuals who claim his son is part of ancient prophecy. They hope to stop the rise of the Antichrist and are convinced it is young Damien. I mean, he is, because that is what the movie is about.

Peck brings an air of serious authority, which helps ground the film. There are some really effective bits, such as a photographer who notices a patter in certain anomalies of photos he has taken.

The film embraces the subject matter without any embarrassment. They are not worried about viewers thinking it is silly, and the performances give the story weight. The music by Jerry Goldsmith is quite iconic with it’s ominous church choir.

The Omen is one of the best Antichrist films, and holds up pretty well over forty years later.

 

Manimal Part 3 (Beastmaster III: The Eye of Braxus, 1996)

beastmaster_iii_poster.jpgSo, this movie picks up with Dar continuing on his casually nomadic life.  The evil Lord Agon is trying to gain the power of the demon Braxus.  He is living off the life force of his community and needs the Eye of Braxus to complete the process and gain power and immortality.

Dar runs into a family seeking King Tal and conveniently for them, Tal is Dar’s brother. He brings the family to see his brother.  Eventually, soldiers for Agon attack.  They kidnap Tal in their attempt to get the Eye of Braxus.

Dar and Tal’s personal guard Seth (who was in the original film) set out to save Tal. Along the way, they team up with the beautiful blonde Shada and the sorceress Morgana.

Beastmaster III was actually part of the Universal Television Network of the mid 1990’s.  But coming a year after Hercules and Xena, this film feels wholly sub-par.

Braxus, the big monster is pretty much Power Ranger levels in appearance.  It looks…well, pretty terrible. It almost looks like it is an extra outfit from the comedy show Dinosaurs.

This is really too bad because the film’s cast includes Tony Todd and David Warner, both terrific character actors.  Overall, this feels like a bad imitation of the Hercules and Xena model and nowhere near campy enough to work.

Can I Play With Madness (In the Mouth of Madness, 1994)

in-the-mouth-of-madness-posterCarpenter returned to the big screen for his next endeavor.  A mind-bending Lovecraft inspired horror film.  Starring Sam Neill, In the Mouth of Madness is about insurance investigator John Trent who is looking into the disappearance of famed horror writer Sutter Cane.

Cane is like Stephen King in popularity, as well as his books being centered around a certain geographical location. Sent on his quest by Charlton Heston’s Jackson Harglow (the publisher), Trent starts to discover that Cane’s books are having a profound and violent impact on his readers.  Trent is finally able to create a map using portions of covers to Cane’s previous books.

He embarks on his journey with publisher liaison Linda Styles (Julie Carmen).  As they arrive, they start noticing something askew with the small town of Hobb’s End.  The buildings all fit locations described in the books.  There are people who seem to be from the books.  At one point, Trent tries to debunk this by pointing out that that they would be able to see an ancient church from a window, but Styles points out he is looking from the wrong window.

As the world seems to unravel before Trent’s eyes, he fights believing what is true.  In the Mouth of Madness is the final film in Carpenter’s loose Apocalypse Trilogy (the first is the Thing and second Prince of Darkness).  And it is a perfectly trippy film.  Carpenter uses the Lovecraft elements particularly well.

The visual effects are very well done, feeding the creepy vibe of the film.  Much of the early part of the film suggests Trent is hallucinating, but upon arriving in Hobb’s End, it is clear that something is truly wrong.  The effects feed this twisting of reality in a particularly effective way.

Carpenter’s direction is on point in this film, he is in control and not having to worry about studio concerns like he did with Memoirs of an Invisible Man.

The cast is very good, and Neill sells both the skeptical investigator and the man losing his mind.  Julie Carmen has the second biggest role in the film, and she is terrific as both support and foil for Neill.

The weakest link is the soundtrack.  Carpenter went for more of a rock vibe, which does not support the film in the way his earlier soundtracks did.

Still, in the end, this one of Carpenters stronger entries and has a lot to enjoy for the viewer.

 

 

 

Crypt Keepin’ Carpenter (Body Bags, 1993)

body-bags-coverAn attempt by Showtime to create a Horror Anthology to compete with HBO’s Tales From the Crypt, Body Bags both starred and featured direction from John Carpenter.  Showtime killed the series but released the three shorts set against bookend segments hosted by Carpenter as a creepy coroner.  His assistant was Tobe Hooper, director of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.  Both directed a segment as well.

Just like the Crypt Keeper, the Coroner makes schlocky jokes, before introducing the story.  It is not entirely certain each bookend was meant for the story that followed.

The first tale, the Gas Station, is about a young woman on her first night working at a gas station on a lonely stretch of road.  After a parade of weirdos, she discovers she is being stalked by a serial killer.  It is not a unique story, but it is well done, with a nice little twist.  Wes Craven has an amusing cameo as a creepy drunk who hits on the young woman.

The second segment, Hair, is about a man who is obsessed with his thinning hair.  In spite of his girlfriend’s insistence that it does not matter to her, he cannot stop fearing losing his hair.  Everywhere he looks he sees luxurious heads of hair.  He drives his girlfriend away because he won’t accept himself.  One night, he discovers a clinic that promise actual regrowth of lost hair.  Richard runs to the clinic for their service.  He is stunned when they try and talk him out of it, but he wants hair.  But in the end, he finds the hair wants him just as much as he wants it.  This is an entertaining story with and entertaining performance from Stacy Keach.  This is also the most humorous of the stories.

The best segment is the Eye, starring Mark Hamill as a minor league baseball player whose career is cut short when he loses an eye. He is offered a chance at a new experimental surgery that gives him a donor eye.  But with the eye comes dark and depraved visions.  Are they his own or the previous owner of the eye? Hamill gives a strong performance.  Of the three tales, this is the best of the bunch.

As with all anthologies, some installments are better than others.  But thankfully, in the case of Body Bags, all three are ranging from decent to very good.  While the first two segments are directed by John Carpenter, the Eye is directed by Tobe Hooper.  This is an enjoyable film.  And for those curious…you get to see Luke Skywalker’s bare butt.

 

 

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