The Original Haunted Palace Rebuilt (House on Haunted Hill, 1999)

1999’s remake of William Castle’s House on Haunted Hill began a series of remakes of mid to late 1950’s horror films. This one keeps the core idea. An eccentric rich man and his estranged wife throw a party, offering a million dollars to whomever lives through the night.

Stephen Price is an amusement park owner with a rather disturbed relationship with his devious wife Evelyn. She wants a party thrown in the restored Vannacutt Psychiatric Institute for the Criminally Insane. Years ago it was run by Dr. Vannacutt who performed ghoulish and cruel experiments. One night his patients revolted, violently killing the Dr and his staff. The Doctor’s last act was to set of a mechanism that locked down the entire facility and set it ablaze, killing all but five employees.

After dumping his wife’s party guest list for his own, Price does not notice the list changes yet again. When the guests arrive, both Stephen and Evelyn are shocked as they do not recognize them. Everyone is greeted by Pritchett, the nervous caretaker who tells everyone just how many people have died there. He wants his money and plans to leave. He refuses to stay in the asylum overnight. But he gets trapped with the confused guests: movie executive Sara, athlete Eddie, disgraced reporter Melissa and the Doctor Blackburn. Everyone has secrets and deceptions. When the planned horror get overtaken by the ghosts and demons of the fortress it becomes a battle for survival.

Geoffrey Rush does a great job as the Vincent Price inspired role of Price and his poisonous banter with with Famke Janssen’s Evelyn is every bit as biting as in the original film. This part is almost purely lifted from the original film, especially the dialog.

The changes from the original allow for surprises and while the heavy use of digital effects are somewhat dated, they do some creative things. The dark spirit that represents the house is made of human bodies intertwining to create a unique shape. Jeffrey Combs has no lines, but his diabolical doctor is effectively chilling.

The addition of the asylum backstory allows for a creepy vibe, as well as the updated addition of how the guests were selected. Chris Kattan is the primary comic relief, and I found his Pritchett to have a bit more vibrant of a personality than in the original.

The remake also manages to give the audience information a bit better than the original, relying on in story moments rather than talking heads. The film also opens with the asylum revolt, turning into an unsolved mysteries type of show (hosted by Peter Graves!) story about the devastation, which is very well done.

Overall, House On Haunted Hill is a pretty effective remake, both fun and exciting.

October 24, 2017 0

Gene Splicing (X3:The Last Stand, 2006)

X-2 was how you build upon a decent movie to make a great second film creating excitement for your franchise. Annnnnnd this one is how you screw it up.

It all starts with Warner Brothers deciding that their superhero films were missing a vital link to making their movies awesome. Getting the guys who made those good X-Men movies. And Bryan Singer answered their call-swayed by his love for the first two Superman movies and he took his major players with him.

Fox and Marvel started to work on a replacement. Darren Aronofsky, Alex Proya, Joss Whedon, Rob Bowman and Zack Snyder were all considered before setting up a deal with Matthew Vaughn (Stardust). After a brief time, Vaughn felt he could not be away from his family for the length of time making the film would require, so he dropped out.

Which leads us to Brett Ratner. Funny enough, before Singer, Ratner was considered for the original X-Men film. Since then he had a string of moderate successes in the Rush Hour films and Red Dragon. I am not going to lie…I cringed at the announcement.

So, the film starts out in the past, with Charles Xavier and Eric Lehnsherr (Magneto) going to meet with young Jean Grey and her parents. Both Xavier and Lehnsherr are taken aback by the latent power house within the child Jean Grey. I am more amazed at the some what humorous digital de-aging of Stewart and McKellen which makes them look kind like…they are made of plastic.

The scene then switches to a young boy in a bathroom. His father is pounding on the door for him to open up… honestly, this is one of the most solid scenes in the film as the young boy is attempting to keep a secret from his father. But his father manages to break in and we see the reveal that he was using a razor blade in an attempt to hack off bird-like wings. There is a real sense of heartbreak, and the actor playing young Warren Worthington is terrific.

We jump to the “near future” with what looks to be a city in ruins with young X-Men under attack. In the end, it is revealed to be a Danger Room training exercise. This is a first, as the Danger Room has not been seen until this film. We also see a Sentinel head in the simulation .

The film draws from Joss Whedon’s “mutant cure” storyline in Astonishing X-Men and the Phoenix Saga…minus pretty much everything from the Phoenix Saga. Cyclops is really broken up, he has stubble, so you know it is bad. Marsten was in Superman returns, so they get rid of him quickly. The story is an interesting idea, the cure for mutant abilities, allowing mutants to no longer be mutants. but it is second fiddle at times to the Phoenix storyline. In the comics, the Phoenix Saga is a large and dramatic storyline that spanned several issues. But here it is compressed into two small hours, lacking much of the

The strongest point of the film is the cast. Along with the cast of regulars, we get Ben Foster as Angel, Kelsey Grammer as the Beast (inspired casting if there ever was) and Ellen Page as Kitty Pryde. While Foster is not as pretty as I pictured Angel to be, he is a solid performer.

Ian McKellan is terrific as usual. He is able to seem dangerous and cruel, yet can seem generous and wise at the turn of a hat. At one point, Pyro makes mention that he would have killed Xavier for him…and Magneto stops and looks sternly at Pyro and defends the greatness of Xavier. McKellan has always done a wonderful job of selling the idea that Magneto truly loved and cared for his friend-in spite of being on opposite sides of the issue. His delivery of the Magneto speeches are poetic.

The problem is…the film is a mish mash of ideas. It has great moments, but it is filled with lazy writing. The resolution of the Phoenix story is troubling. Rather than letting her sacrifice herself what we get is depressing and problematic. The character could not just “get better”, she had killed to many people to come back from that. And she is so powerful, that letting her go forward would be hard to defend and there is no way to “imprison” her. The original story was grandly cosmic, and I realize that it was unlikely that we would see that version on film. Brett Ratner is clearly trying to go big, but it tends to fall short. Characters get short changed and used without much thought of their potential. It is by the books, taking interesting ideas from the comics and executing them badly. Professor X is basically reduced to Professor Exposition, leaving Stewart to fend for himself in a massively reduced role. I realize some of this may have been related to actors schedules and the like, but there is little effort to deal with the absences in a way other than to hope you forget they are not there. And what is the point of de-powering Magneto if you are going to end on him getting his power back right before the credits roll?

Rogue should be the real heart of this story. Her struggle is easy to connect to. She wants contact, but her powers prevent that. Yet, the character disappears for large swaths of the film. She misses the final battle entirely.

The film has some good effects, and often the actors overcome stiff or lazy dialog…but in the end, after the powerful and exciting X2, this movie just trips over itself.

This is the Alien: Resurrection of the franchise. And yet, it was better than Superman Returns. Go figure.

July 27, 2016 0

Gene Therapy (X2:X-Men United, 2003)

While it had it’s flaws, X-Men was a solid enough success to warrant a sequel. X-Men 2 went into production under Singer’s guidance. You do not fix what is not broke after all. And Singer got people excited by suggesting this was going to be his Empire Strikes Back.

Picking up pretty much where we left off, mutants are still feared, Magneto is in a cell of plastic, receiving visits from Professor X, who is trying to win his friend back.

In an excellent setup, we are introduced to Nightcrawler. He has infiltrated the White House with a band of tourists and takes off to assassinate the President. It is a really thrilling sequence that sets the film into motion. Professor X and the X-men start trying to locate this mutant who tried to kill the president.

The President is holding meetings with his advisors and General Stryker (played excellently by Brian Cox) . Stryker is the very type of person Magneto fears coming to power. He distrusts and despises mutants, and seeks to eradicate them. And part of that is to put an end to the threat he sees in the Xavier School for Gifted Children. He has been collecting information using as ort of “truth serum/mind control” on mutants.

That evening, with only Wolverine to watch over the kids, Cyclops and Professor X go to see Magneto, while Storm and Jean Grey track down Nightcrawler. Magneto has managed to set up an elaborate and exciting escape. At the same time, Jean and Storm have located Nightcrawler hiding in a church that is under renovation. They are surprised to find a somewhat timid and fearful mutant, not the hardened terrorist one might expect.

While this is going on, Stryker launches an assault on the school. It is here that he is surprised to discover Wolverine, suggesting Stryker may have answers to Wolverine’s past. Wolverine escape with Rogue, Bobby/Iceman and John/Pyro.

Ultimately, the mutants all meet up, knowing they must fight together to stop Stryker’s madness. He plans to use tech and Xavier to destroy all mutants. This leads Magneto and the X-Men to work together in an assault on Stryker’s underground bunker. They save the Xavier, Cyclops and the students but Magneto has no intention of trusting Xavier’s lofty goals and takes off, Pyro in tow. In their attempt to get out safely, The X-Men find themselves suffering another loss.

X2 really set the bar for Super-hero films. In describing it as his Empire, Singer really hit the nail on the head. It is a bit darker than it’s predecessor, the stakes seem higher and the losses more painful. Oh yeah, it ends on a cliffhanger of sorts. All the things that the X-Men comics excel at are present in Singer’s film.

The story functions both in allegory and straightforward adventure. There is humor, heartache, mystery and excitement. The writing really capture the characters, giving the performer and director a solid road map.

Nightcrawler is played to perfection by Alan Cummings. He is the sensitive and compassionate spiritual soul, but also the free-spirited swashbuckling showman. As I mentioned, Cox really hits it out of the park as Stryker. A menacing zealot, willing to sacrifice the dignity of his own child in his thirst for vengeance.

Not shockingly, of course, McKellen’s portrayal of Magneto is top notch. Bringing depth and thoughtfulness to the character. He has many great moments both exciting (his clever escape scene) and quiet (he has a nice moment where he discusses what it is to be a mutant in the world with Pyro. It is seductive in it’s emotional appeal).

Jackman shows a real affinity for the character of Wolverine. He’s able to bring together both the gruffness and genuine protectiveness that has long been a part of the character. And he still managed to pull off crazy “berserker rage” with Wolverine. This is also some terrific moments of humor for the character.

The pairing of Rogue and Iceman works real well in the film. Their attempts to navigate a relationship without touch is nicely handled. Both Sean Ashmore and Anna Paquin have a sweet chemistry that sells the relationship.

Some complain about the heavy handed-ness of the mutant=gay subtext. But the thing about the X-Men is, they address the “subtext of the times”. There was a time when mutant=race was the primary read…but the gay subtext is a pretty natural fit.

Like I said, the film raised the bar. X2 is easily still one of the top five super-hero films. It manages to both be enjoyable for a newer fan with plenty to reward the die-hard fan. This is a solid film that still holds up.

July 26, 2016 0

First Mutations (X-Men, 2000)

X-Men kind of set a template for Marvel films that they have stayed fairly close to and it has served them well. Get a director with some real film cred, and the rest will follow. X-Men is certainly proof that it is an effective approach.

Really, it was the hiring of Bryan Singer (then most recognized for the Usual Suspects) that got actors to take notice. Most of the actors admitted no familiarity with the comics, and Bryan was not a fan of the series when he came on board. While having a non-fanboy running the show ruffled some feathers (especially when it was revealed that none of the X-Men would be wearing costumes), it really seemed to miss the point.

A good storyteller need not be a fan to tell a great tale about these characters. Patrick Stewart’s lack of interest in Sci-Fi did not stop him from becoming a beloved Star Trek Captain or Professor X. And many of the actors opted to research their characters by reading the comics. Sir Ian McKellan devoted an extensive section of his website to Magneto, he found simple ways to connect the characters to real life.

Of course, the big issue was Wolverine. Hugh Jackman was way to tall to play the runt. Oh, the frustrations comic fans are forced to deal with. Along with the previously mentioned news that Singer was ditching the costumes in favor of leather uniforms. So, things were stacking up against it in the eyes of fans and creators.

The film begins in the early 1940’s. A concentration camp to be specific. Weakened and fearful Jewish families are herded through an iron gate. The Nazi soldiers begin to separate out children. One young boy and his parents reach for each other, and as the young boy becomes more frantic, we notice little things. The metal in the gates starts to reach back towards the boy-and he and the soldiers holding on to him are dragged towards the warping gates. After knocking the boy out, the soldiers stare in confusion at the mangled gates before them. Next is an introduction to Rogue (Anna Paquin). She is in her room with a young man and they start to kiss…suddenly, he starts to appear sickly, veins seeming to grow across his face. She starts screaming as the boy convulses before her. These are dramatic starts for a very ambitious film. A few years earlier Batman and Robin crashed the comic book movie boom. And yet, Singer was taking the X-men seriously.

The film quickly works to bring all the characters together. and there is little time wasted in creating the team, tying it around Wolverine and Rogue.

The film, despise an easy premise, suffers from the problem from so many first films for a franchise…”Introductoritus”. It is a large ensemble, and I get wanting to put in all sorts of stuff for the die hard fan to get excited over. But it is a big cast and that means some folks will get glossed over. Halle Berry’s Storm is flat and pretty lifeless. Some of it is the writing, some is the performance. Hugh Jackman does a terrific job as Wolverine. He is convincing as a loner, yet the (sibling like) bond with Rogue is believable. As his his friction with Cyclops and the magnetism with Jean Grey. Unfortunately, Marsten’s Cyclops is often kind of boring when not interacting with Wolverine. Their verbal sparring is definitely a highlight of the film. It often feels like the film really is not sure how they want to portray Storm and Cyclops.

But in the end, Storm gets the biggest shaft in character development. Some of the film’s worst lines come from Storm. There is the scene where she and Wolverine are discussing the coming war between mutants-those who wish to peacefully co-exist with homo sapiens and those who wish to rule as homo-superior. She tells Wolverine at least she has chosen aside. As if merely choosing a side gives you some nobility (hint-it does not). I mean, yeah, she chose Professor X’s side…but what if she had chosen Magneto’s side? There is also the infamous “what happens to a toad when struck by lightning” gag. It falls flat. It was a contribution of Joss Whedon, who swears that it was all Halle Berry’s delivery that resulted in it being so ridiculed.

Both Patrick Stewart and McKellan give rousing performances, while Hugh Jackman proved that he could embody Wolverine even though he was of average height. Stewart and McKellan really provide a sense of a longstanding friendship that is needed as the foundation of the story. The effects were solid for the time, many mutant powers from the comics really came to life.

On the other hand, the film is so busy introducing the concept and the characters, the plot seems under developed. It is a pretty herculean task to try and bring a single character with over forty years of backstory to a finite two hour movie. Trying to bring the X-Men-full of hundreds of characters together cohesively? You have to choose who you want to focus on, knowing you will deal with complaints either way. Singer, Tom Desanto and David Hayter struggle valiantly to bring together character and story, but really, it fell mostly on the side of character development. Understandable, as the X-Men have a rich cast to choose from.

Toad and Sabertooth come off as pretty bland and one dimensional for most of the film, not contributing much until the end.

For Singer, this was easily his most ambitious film to date. Not so much in story, but in cast size, and general scale. But he does a pretty solid job with the film overall. He seems to understand the sense of scope a film like this needed-in spite of his background in smaller films, he seemed to transition quite well to the grand scale needed for the X-Men.

The film’s overall plot is probably less memorable than it’s various character moments, and in that sense, the movie is hurt. What could have been a terrific film is simply a good start…it is just a set up.

July 25, 2016 0